Category: Faith

(image copyright Globe and Mail)

This story by Michael Valpy in the Globe and Mail worries me. (Go and read it now, because I think the Globe will make it part of a paid archive in a week. That’s why I posted the above picture). The same-sex marriage issue is coming to a head in Canada and we’re seeing the same sort of opposition from Canada’s admittedly less-aggressive Religious Right. One of the strangest sights I’ve seen recently was a demonstration against same-sex marriage featuring Sikhs, Muslims, and Christians. Wouldn’t it be great if we could all get together to work for something positive instead of just reacting to something that we’re afraid of?

I do a lot of head-shaking and eye-rolling when I read articles like this one, but the truth is that I’m a bit frightened. Every day I feel further and further away from a subculture that once nurtured me. I’m not sure how much I’ve changed, but I know that the evangelical culture has changed a lot in the past 25 years. It seems to me that a sort of rigidity has set in. (I’m tempted to say ‘rigor mortis’). Despite the claims of huge growth among evangelicals, I’m deeply disturbed that it hasn’t made a whit of difference in the world. Poverty, war, oppression. It’s the same old story. A recent book by Ron Sider called The Scandal of the Evangelical Conscience explored this area and discovered that evangelicals have the same rates of divorce, the same levels of materialism, the same struggles with racism. It’s more disturbing because we preach so loudly about other people’s “sins”. Jesus said that before we can remove the speck from our brother’s eye, we need to remove the plank from our own eye. That’s always made me smile, but it’s so true.

P.S. I realize the irony that I’m ranting about the “sins” of the Religious Right, so I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not perfect either. But wouldn’t it be great if we could actually talk to each other rationally instead of shouting at each other? For a nice balance to the Globe and Mail story, here’s a story from the Sunday Star about a reporter who went across Canada asking regular people their opinions on same-sex marriage. As always, regular people can surprise you. (Same 7-day archive policy applies, so read it now)

The Reverend Mel White was a good evangelical soldier for a long time. He ghost-wrote books for Christian leaders like Jerry Falwell, Billy Graham and Pat Robertson. But he had a secret that caused him torment for many years. He was gay. After many years of “reparative therapies” that included electric shock and exorcism, he finally made peace with his sexuality. In 1993, he came out publicly, writing a book called Stranger at the Gate: To Be Gay and Christian in America. Needless to say, it was the end of his cozy relationship with evangelicalism. But not the end of the relationship altogether.

In an interview with the Southern Poverty Law Center, Reverend White talks about his continuing work to fight against the bigotry and hatred perpetrated by “Christians” against gays and lesbians. White is the founder of Soulforce, an activist group based upon the civil disobedience tactics of Gandhi and Martin Luther King Jr. Soulforce is behind the Dear Dr. Dobson site I wrote about a few months ago.

One of the most interesting things I read in the interview was that Reverend White and his partner Gary Nixon have actually been attending his old friend Jerry Falwell’s church in Lynchburg, Virginia for the past two years and whenever Falwell says anything derogatory about homosexuals, they stand in silent protest. I wonder if anyone talks to them at the church socials.

Toronto actor Jason Hildebrand is performing a one-man show this weekend based on Donald Miller’s book Blue Like Jazz. This will be touring Europe and the rest of North America this fall, but if you live in Toronto, this promises to be a very interesting presentation of the ideas presented in the book, which declares itself to be “nonreligious thoughts on Christian spirituality.” The author will be in attendance at the launch of the show at the Artword Theatre, 75 Portland Street. Tickets can be had by calling the St. Lawrence Centre at (416) 366-7723, Ext. 290 or you can book online.

Interesting to note that the music is by Paul Neufeld, the Juno-winning musical genius who also played at our wedding, and that the project is being partially produced by Imago, which is run by my old prof and friend John Franklin. I just found out about this today, and it’s short notice, but I’m going to try my best to be there.

Brooke and I have struggled over the years to find a church home. Though I’d consider myself a convinced Christian, Brooke still has a lot of questions, and that’s a difficult situation in which to meet new people. I’ve also struggled personally for a long time trying to recapture the feeling of vibrant community with which I began my spiritual journey. I spent the 1980s as part of a pretty unique youth group and I suppose that’s been a hard act to follow. I’ve had to learn that those experiences can’t be recaptured.

Last week, I had the privilege of going out for dinner with two of my companions from those heady days. At one time in the late 1980s, we had all shared an apartment together. One is now director of an inner-city mission organization who recently survived a serious accident. While surfing in Hawaii, he was hit by a large wave and suffered a spinal injury. He was paralyzed and almost drowned, but has made remarkable progress and now is almost back to normal physically. Spiritually and mentally, this experience has changed him dramatically. He’s reaching out to his friends much more. He’s slowed down his workaholic habits. He’s savouring all the good things in his life. I don’t see this friend that often. The last time I saw him was at his 40th birthday last October, about a month before his accident.

The other friend is someone I still see quite a lot. He’s had a very different journey. Almost fifteen years ago, he sent me a letter from Ottawa, where he was living at the time. “I’m gay,” he told me. I was the first person who knew, and it fell to me to tell the rest of our highly-conservative friends. Over the years, he’s become estranged from Christianity to the point where he declares himself an atheist. And yet he’s still one of my closest friends. He will turn 40 this summer, just as I turned 40 in February. So, we’re all mellowing with age and thinking of what is important to us.

One of the things we talked about was church. And I got to thinking that one of the reasons I didn’t feel very enthusiastic about joining another church is that so many churches want you to join every activity they have going, and to focus your entire life, social and otherwise, around their program. I began to think that perhaps I already have a kind of church, a community of people whom I care about and who care for me. Many of them aren’t Christians, or are disillusioned “ex”-Christians, but isn’t that kind of irrelevant? Instead of trying to surround myself with people whom I’m supposed to be like, I’ve already surrounded myself with the people I am like.

And so instead of hurrying to commit to a new group of strangers who probably don’t need me, I’m rededicating myself to the people in my life with whom I don’t spend nearly enough time. It’s important to live out the love that I claim is so central to my faith. And we’ll see where it goes from there.